Even-Tempered Folks Need to Focus Loyalty Upon God Not Others
This is part six of a nine-part series on understanding different personalities. The reason we are examining this topic is because, in my opinion, the better we understand how God made us and each other, and the better we understand how God loves each of us perfectly, the better we can love each other.
The last several weeks we looked at the strengths and weaknesses of Driven/Task-Oriented (D/TO) people and Optimistic/People-Oriented (O/PO) people. For each I gave some suggestions on how to maximize strengths and minimize weaknesses. And then we saw how to love better the people who tend toward these personality types.
This week we will be introducing the Even-tempered/Status Quo-Oriented (E/SO) personality.
People who tend toward this personality type typically prefer an environment that is slower paced without a lot of change. They prefer stability and security.
As the name implies, the E/SO person is even-tempered meaning they rarely get too mad or too happy or too sad or too anything. And even when they do experience a deeper emotion, they don’t express it outwardly. In fact, many E/SO’s see others who seem to let their emotions flow as being out of control.
E/SO people prefer an environment free of conflict—especially in the home. Tone in someone’s voice indicates whether there is conflict or not. They are very sensitive to an abrupt or harsh tone. When approached this way, they will probably retreat into an even more quiet and pensive mode.
They don’t like change, but if change is inevitable, then the change needs to be gradual allowing them time to adjust to the change.
An E/SO person is a great team player. They are steady and loyal. They are loyal and hold loyalty as a highly valued quality.
E/SO’s are thinkers and observers. They are typically quiet but not necessarily shy. In a group, probably one or two people that are nearest to the E/SO person will be giggling because the E/SO has a dry sense of humor and probably shared some funny nuggets under his breath.
Because they are quiet, dispassionate and laid back about most things, they can come across as lazy or no fun. Many times it does take a little fire under them to get them going. But once you get them going, they will steadily work until the work is complete.
If you ask an E/SO their preference on something, they will probably respond with, “I don’t care.” And they really don’t. Here is a typical conversation between two E/SO’s: “What do you want to do?” “I don’t care, what do you want to do?” “I don’t care what do you want to do?” “I don’t care…”
If you are an E/SO here are a few suggestions on how to emphasize your strengths and minimize your weaknesses. Recognize that not all conflict is bad. How one deals with conflict can be. Prayerfully consider what is the best action before the Lord and then ask for His power and direction to accomplish it regardless of the consequences.
Although change for change’s sake may not always be good, there are many times that change can be good. Your tendency to take a long time to accept change can sometimes be damaging to a situation or relationships.
You may feel that you are handling a situation well by not letting your emotions get out of hand when you are angry, but you may tend to covertly take it out on others through passive-aggressive behavior. This is just as bad. “Stuffing it” usually leads to big explosions later and may lead to physical problems of your own.
Being in control of your emotions is good. However, you can come across as dispassionate and uncaring. Ask God to give you His heart for people and also ask Him to help you express it well to them.
Because you desire peace at almost all costs, you are prone to stretch the truth (lie) in order to keep things from becoming too difficult. Know that lying lips are an abomination to the Lord and ask for more sensitivity in your heart.
Steadiness and thoroughness are wonderful. However, you must evaluate whether the investment of time is worth the consequences of taking too long to fulfill an accomplishment.
God has given you an amazing ability to loyally and steadily follow through with tasks and provide stable, cool-headed environments. Make sure that loyalty is ultimately focused upon God and not others and God will do accomplish great things through you and your faith in Him!
Scot Wall is pastor of Magnolia Bible Church and the new Texas State Capitol Minister with Capitol Commission. Send comments to ConsiderThis@magnoliabible.org.